I have a bad habit of avoiding things I know I’m not good at, or strongly suspect I wouldn’t be good at. I don’t like to look foolish or feel incompetent. I enjoy doing things that I’m better at.
While I don’t think this tendency is uncommon, I’m not convinced it’s healthy.
I know I can’t realistically be good at everything, but I think I subconsciously want to be. I would love to be great at everything.
But that isn’t realistic. I don’t have the natural aptitude for some things (ahem, organized sports), or the time and effort required to hone other skills I might be otherwise able to pursue (speaking another language, playing piano).
I have limited time and energy. I can’t work hard enough or long enough to be good at everything. I have to pick and choose what I want to invest in, which means letting go of some things in order to pursue others.
And that’s okay. That’s what makes me, me.
And the things you’re good at are the things that make you, you.
Of course, we can work to gain new skills— and we should. There are things that would make doing our jobs easier or managing our families smoother or simply living life better. But we don’t have to do it all. We can choose which things we’re going to support and invest in, which ones we’re going to let others do for us, and which ones we’re going to let go.
But we don’t have to do it all. We can choose which things we’re going to support and invest in, which ones we’re going to let others do for us, and which ones we’re going to let go of completely.
There are tons of resources and services for things like meal planning, meal deliveries, mail-order prescriptions, subscription services for makeup, food, clothing, and more. If those aren’t things that you enjoy doing, or things that you’re not particularly good at, you can choose to let someone else take care of it for you.
I personally like grocery shopping and cooking, and I highly value having a clean home. But I’m choosing to not worry about the fact that I don’t know how to do home improvement tasks or car repairs myself or the fact that I don’t use Twitter. Those things just aren’t me. And that’s okay.
There are things that I would like to eventually learn (like watercoloring and better bicycling skills), but I’m giving myself permission to not stress about them. Maybe one day I’ll get there. Maybe I won’t. Either way, it’s not the end of the world.
For now, I’ll stick to things that I really enjoy, whether I’m good at them or not. And I won’t waste my time trying to be anything I’m not. I’ll let others be good at what they’re good at and do my best to squash the voice of comparison telling me I have to compete to be the best at everything.
What things do you love doing? What things are you choosing to not do? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!
Image source: Steinar Engeland, https://unsplash.com